Blood On The Roses
by Invader-Hime
Summary: Saionji hasn't been himself lately...literally. Halloween present for loyal readers
1. Seemingly Peaceful Evening

Chibi Hime here!  
My first Utena fic!  
I noticed there was a severe lacking of Utena horror stories and none that had Saionji as a werewolf. (can't you see him as a big green wolf in a tattered sudent council uniform?) So, I decided to write one. Takes place during the tv show, relatively early, though no specific place.  
  
  
  
I don't own any utena characters, only the story.  
  
Blood on the Roses  
Chapter One-Peaceful evening  
  
Utena sat by the window of the dorm room she shared with Anthy Himemiya. She could hear Chu-Chu inside of a potato chip bag on the table behind her. She glanced outside wistfully and sighed.   
  
"What a perfect evening, it's so peaceful. What do you think, Chu-Chu?"  
  
"Chuuuuuuuuuuuuu," came the sigh from within the potato chip bag,  
  
"Yeah, I think so too. You know what, Chu-Chu? I think there's going to be a full moon in a few days by the looks of it. I'll go look,"  
She got up and checked the calendar she had hung by her bed. Indeed, a full moon was two nights away. She turned to the purple creature who had crawled out of the potato chip bag and was using her pillow as a trampoline.  
"We're doing a project on lunar phases in school," she informed the bouncing Chu-Chu.  
She smiled and changed ino her pajamas.  
"Good-night, Chu-Chu. I'm going to need my pillow back," she pulled it farther to her side of the bed and Chu-Chu curled up next to her head and fell asleep. Anthy was away on a field trip with her poetry class and would be gone for a week. Utena was glad to finally get some personal space, it was creepy having Anthy around all the time.  
She drifted off to sleep by the sound of Chu-Chu's snores.  
  
Across Campus  
Saionji sat bolt upright in bed. He hadn't been able to sleep decently for about a week. His every slumber was greeted by horrifying nightmares of himself turning into a wolflike creature. He had tried to convince himself they were only dreams, they couldn't hurt him. But he always awoke in a cold sweat, his long, green hair always clinging to his face. No matter how hard he tried, he could not accept these as mere apparitions of the mind.. He was breathing hard now and perspiration was dripping off him. He contemptuously wiped his face off with his hand and got up to get a glass of ice water to relax himself. He more or less stumbled down the hall, at first, he had fallen as soon as he tried to stand up, but the second time, he managed to pull himself up using his dresser and walking against the wall to guide himself to the sink.  
As he gulped down the water from the glass he always kept by the sink, he reflected on how fortunae it was that he was a member of the student council and therefore did not have to have a roomate. He felt that if anyone found out about him, the captain of the Kendo team, unable to navigate his own hallway, he'd never live it down.   
He choked on the water as suddenly, a fiery pain ripped across his midsection. He choked ferociously as he struggled for air. As instantaneously as the pain had appeared, it disappeared, leaving him face down on the floor coughing. He got to his hands and knees, occasionally rocked by a residual cough. He began to think he had overcome his attack when he glanced down at one of his hands. His eyes grew wide at what he saw. His nails were turning black and legnthening into long, curved claws and his fingers were stretching, his room was so silent, he could hear his own bones cracking. A small patch of green fur began to appear on the back of his hand. It grew slowly, slowy until it covered th whole back of his hand. If you could call it a hand, it seemed now more like an enormous claw or...... paw?  
It was all he could stand, throwing to the wind all he had ever cared about image and position, he screamed. As loud as he could, hoping to wake himself from this nightmare. Unfortunately, this was no nightmare, it was real.   
He was suddenly brought back to reality when heard a knocking on his door, an undeclassman had heard his screaming down the hall and had come to check on him. Saionji did not dare answer the door. His reason had returned and if some underclassman saw him with his hand like that, everyone would know. He saw the knob turning and realized that he had forgotten to lock the door. Now, no matter what, that underclassman was going to come in and find him digraced, sitting on the floor of the hallway next to the bathroom. Unable to do much else, Saionji thrust his "misshapen" hand behind his back. Moments later, the bewildered underclassman stepped into the room.  
"Sempai, are you alright? I heard screaming,"  
"It was nothing, only a nightmare. I'll be fine,"  
"Are you sure? You look shaken,"  
"Yes, I'm sure. You can go now,"  
"Okay," The underclassman turned and began to leave.  
"Thank-You,"  
"What?"  
"For coming to check on me,"  
"Oh, sure. Good night,"  
The underclassman was even more perplexed upon leaving than when hed had arrived. Saionji, actually acting a little nice? Something was wrong, he had looked pale and he was awkwardly holding his arm behind his back. The underclassman sighed, returned to his room and quickly drifted off into a peaceful slumber.  
Meanwhile, Saionji sat in the hallway staring at the wall across from him, barely comprehending what just happened. He suddenly remembered his hand and withdrew it from where he had placed it behind his back. He stared at is with unbelieving eyes. It was perfectly normal, smooth skin, perfect nails, nothing out of the ordinary. He blinked, then continued staring at the wall until his alarm clock across the room went off six hours later.  
What's going on here?What's happening to me? he thought as he dressed himself. For the first time in his life that he could remember, he was terrified out of his mind and had no idea what to do.  
End chapter 1 


	2. Unlikely Alliance

As before, I own nothing in the surreal reality of utena, it'd be cool though.  
  
  
  
Blood On The Roses Chapter 2  
Unlikely Alliance  
  
Utena yawned loudly. seventh hour study hall was always such a bore, there was nothing to really be concerned with, she was usually too tired to do homework and too awake to sleep. She enjoyed drawing with Wakaba most of the time, but today her perky friend ws absent. She began to daydream about nothing in particular, just dayreaming. Without warning, the door to the classroom burst open. All the students turned their attention to the doorway, where the disruptive intruder made his entrance. Unfortunately, it wasn't really an intruder, it was an unusually dissheveled Saionji who slunk into the room on wobbly legs and flopped down into Wakaba's empty desk beside Utena, as it was the only desk which remained unoccupied. The teacher began to lecture him on how important it was to be punctual and how as a member of the Student Council he had to set a good example for the rest of the students.  
Utena cast a glance in Saionji's direction. She gave a start when she looked at his eyes, they were bloodshot and exhausted. He put his head on his crossed arms and waited for the teacher to finish her lecture. He wished she would be quiet, her high voice hurt his ears, which were oddly sensitive that day. He felt himself being watched and turned his head to the left, directly into the blue eyes of Utena Tenjou.  
"What?" he asked, muffled by his sleeved arms.  
Utena looked surprised, she had never thought he would willingly address her of all people. She stammered:  
"Oh, Ummm, nothing. It's just that well, you look terribly tired. Even I notice,"  
"I haven't slept in four days, haven't slept well for a week,"  
"Why not?"  
"Why should I tell you?"  
"Hey! I'm just trying to help! You're the one who started crying a river on me! Now it's your responsibility, and obligation to tell me what's wrong so I can masterfully think of a way to assist you!"  
"Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" the teachers annoying voice shot at Utena. Saionji clasped his hands over his pained ears. Utena blushed and looked back at Saionji.   
"It's not your business. Why would you help me anyway?"  
In a distinctly lower voice, Utena responded:  
"Well, its obvious that you need to address whatever is bothering you before you really hurt yourself. It's my duty as a human being to make sure you do something, no matter what's come between us in the past. It's just the right thing to do,"  
"Feh,"  
"Really, I won't tell anyone else. I promise, I respect what is important to others and I know your image is important to you,"  
"Fine , but not here,"  
"All right, you name the place,"  
"The rose garden,at five o'clock. Only duelsists and the Rose Bride are allowed in there. It will be private and sound proof,"  
"Fine by me,"  
Utena took out her Lunar phases chart. Saionji looked over, She was copying notes from another book onto her paper, so she didn't notice he was looking, or the way his eyes widened when he realized that tomorrow night was a full moon. He began to sweat and his hands felt clammy suddenly.  
No! It couldn't be. It just couldn't. Why, if it is, which I'm not saying it is, didn't it happen before? It just can't be. I'm probably just hallucinating because I haven't been getting enough sleep. He thought to himself.  
The seventh hour bell rang and all the other students quickly got up and left. It was a Friday afternoon and everyone wanted to get home for the weekend. Except for Utena, who always stayed on weekends and Saionji who slowly dragged himself up and out of the classroom.  
Utena let a look of worry show on her face. She hadn't realized he looked this bad. She smiled and shouted to him:  
"Hey, Saionji see you at five. Try to get some rest, okay?"  
He looked at her for a moment and gave a half smile, it seemed to take all the extra stregnth he had to manage that. Then, he continued towards his dorm.  
Did he actually try to be nice? What's going on? Utena thought to herself. She shrugged, threw her bag over her shulder and went to her dorm room.  
.............................................................4:30 PM  
  
Utena folded her lunar chart an prepared to o met Saionji. A large silver sphere caught her attention.  
"Hey, there's a full moon tomorrow! I'll have to take some pictures of it for extra credit!"  
She put away her materials and made herself a snack and........waited.  
4:45 PM  
Now she could go, it only took her ten minutes to walk to the rose garden, but she knew that people who are so utterly exhausted like Saionji was, were irked by the tiniest offenses, might as well be on time.  
When she got to the rose garden, she did not see anyone. So, she went inside to wait, eager to enjoy being early for once. Upon entering, she heard a voice from the corner say,  
"You're early,"  
Saionji!  
"So are you, " Utena observed,"When did you get here?"  
"Two hours ago,"  
"Why?"  
"Some annoying underclassman was telling his buddies about last night and they were all waiting for me outside of my room. So, I cam here instead. You should have heard the way they were whispering, like no on would here them!"  
"Whispering? Where were you? In relation to them, I mean?"  
"Down he hall and around the corner,"  
"And you heard them?"  
"Yes, is that so bizarre your mind can't comprehend it? My ears are very sensitive today, I don't know why,"  
"That's why you covered your ears during study hall, that "shhhhh" hurt, Am I right?"  
"Yes,"  
"Hmmm. So what happened last night?"  
"He came into my room. It was my fault, I didn't lock the door. I.I had a nightmare and I screamed. I guess it was louder than I thought,"  
"What was it about? Do you remember?"  
"Yes, Hey what is this? Twenty-questions?"  
"I'm trying to help, remember? It's therepeutic to talk about your problems, it kind of releases them from you, you know?"  
"Fine. It was a stupid dream. I dreamed I turned into a monster,"  
"What kind?"  
"I don't know, a big green wolf-like monster. But, it doesn't look like a wolf, it's feet and hands are different. . It is bigger and more muscular than any wolf I've ever seen,"  
"Interesting, Is that why you can't sleep?"  
"Yes, that nightmare is waiting for me every time I shut my eyes,"  
'Has anything else happened? Anything at all?"  
Shoud I tell her I was awake when I screamed last night? She might tell everyone! She said she wouldn't, Can I trust my enemy? Do I have a choice? Maybe she knows a way to help me.   
Utena could tell he was thinking.  
"Something did happen, didn't it? Tell me everything, I'm trying to help you, Damn it!"  
He was caught by her sudden outburst.  
"Okay....Last night......," he seemed to have trouble finding words. He swallowed seceral times and continued.  
"Last night, My dream started t be real"  
"What?"  
"It started like the dream always does. There's always pain here," he tapped the left breast on his uniform. "Then my hand hurts and it changes,"  
"Into what?"  
"I don't know! A big claw or something!"  
"Like in the dream? Exactly?"  
"Yes! Do I have to spell it out! Do you know how hard it is to tell everything that makes me vulnerable to someone like you?"  
"I'm sorry, I know this must be hard for you, but, I promised to help you and that's what I'm going to do,"  
"How?"  
"I don't know. I'll think of something, though,"  
Utena turned her attention to the purple and pink sky above her. The sun was setting and it was very breathtaking.  
"It's so pretty," she whispered to herself. She was shaken from her enjoyment, by a gasping sound coming from Saionji.  
"Saionji? what is it?"  
"It hurts,"  
"Where?"  
He grabbed the fabric of his uniform on the left side. Utena's eyes grew wide,  
"What's going on?" she asked.  
"I don't know. It hurts, it burns, It feels lke a bunch of needles are trying to poke their way through my skin,"  
"Saionji! Your hand! It's bleeding!"  
Blood was dripping thickly on the floor, falling in heavy drops. Saionji opened his hand to reveal his growing claws that had sunk into the palm of his clenched hand and cut deep into his skin. The burning feeling began on the back of his hand and spread up his arm. Utena gasped, the burning was the sprouting of green fur, which went all the way up to his elbow. She also noticed his fingers were growing larger and longer. His palm was growing thicker as well, now accomadating two doglike pads. Utena noticed Saionji's ears had become long and pointed, he noticed her staring.  
"What?"  
"Your ears....."  
"What's wrong with them?"  
"Feel with your good hand,'  
"What the-What is wrong with me?"  
"Saionji, your other hand!"  
"Now it's changing too? How much am I going to change? Why won't it stop?"  
Utena could tell he was losing control, getting panicked. The more upset he became, the faster the fur seemed to crawl up his arms.  
"Saionji! Calm down! I think you're changing faster as you get upset,"  
"How can i calm down?!!"  
"Just try!"  
He tried, he tried as hard as he could. But panic kept creeping into his mind. Utena's scowl brought him back to relaxing. As he relaxed, he noticed the fur begin to retreat, which helped him to calm down more. After a few minutes, the only sign of his transformation was the injured hand. Utena checked the wound.  
"We'd better get to my dorm room. I have a first aid kit and I can think about what to do," she sugested.  
"I see, that way we avoid the nurse and any unwanted questions,"  
"Exactly,"   
.....................  
After she dressed Saionji's wound, Utena began to research the problem. She could find no medical cause for it. She slammed her fist down on the table in frustration, causing a book about lunar legends to fall open, she had borrowed it from the library for her project. As if by magic, the book fell open to a page with a large wolflike creature on it. A sudden light of realization dawned on Utena as she read the page. The symptoms matched exactly and so did the time period, tomorrow was a full moon. Of course! Why hadn't she relized it sooner.  
"Saionji! I know what's wrong with you!"  
"Well, that's a start. What is it?"  
"Oh, you're a...a werewolf,"  
"What?"  
"I said-"  
"I heard what you said! How can that be possible? It can't be! I can't be a.....an animal! I'm not!"  
"I don't know, but at least we know what's wrong,"  
"But, I don't want to be! I don't want to be some kind of monster!"  
"You're afraid, I can tell. What are you afraid of?"  
"Nothing!"  
"But you are, don't hide it,"  
"I don't want to live as a freak. No one would look up to me, they'd avoid me! I'd spend most of my time trying to escape being killed. I couldn't stand that! I don't want to be an animal! I just want to stay myself! Why hasn't it happened before if that's what it is?"  
"I can't explain that, but I can xplin why our changes progress slowly. The moon begins to enter its phase here on the chart, so your body gets "false alarms" and changes a little, but not all the way because it isn't a full moon. Tomorrow is, so you'll probably make a full transformation,"  
"You mean-"  
"You'll become the creature from your dreams,"  
  
5:50 pm  
  
The two had decided to o down to the rose garden again, even if it was Saturday and there were less than five people on the campus, they wanted to be sure no one else noticed. Utena stood by the door patiently. She cast a glance over at Saionji, who was moving with agitation.  
"Are you okay, Saionji?"  
"i'm not sure. For the firs time in my life I'm terrified. What if something goes wrong and I'm stuck forever?"  
"I doubt that will happen, you may not even tranform at all," she tried to cheer him up.  
As the sun slowly dipped below the horizon, Saionji saw mental flashes of the creature from his dream in his mind. It was from varius angles, almost like.... a blueprint? A sudden pain gripped his head and the dream played through again, faster than ever before. He suddenly realized what was going on. His body was doublechecking the plan. No........  
Utena noticed Saionji's panicked expression.  
"Saionji? What's wrong is it starting?"  
"The dream......No! I don't want to be that.....thing!" Saionji was fighting an unseen force and losing horribly.  
There was a horrible ripping sound a enormous black claws burst from the tips of his fingers, causing blood to spatter on everything. He grabbed his left wrist as if to cut off circulation.  
"Utena,....it burns"  
She took his hand and inspected it and almost dropped it as thick, spiky green fur shot up through the pores of his skin. The fur coninued sprouting all the way up his arm, moving over him like a wave. His shirt becoming noticably tighter in a matter of seconds. The immense pain knocked him against the wall. Where he gasped and choked. He struggled to undo the clip at his neck, but his hands were stll changing and were difficult to work with. Utena leaned over and undid it for him. Green fur spilled out as she did. She looked at his face, which, with the exception of the green fur crawling up his neck, looked normal. But then he opened his eyes. They were still the same grey color they always were, but as he opened them, his ears grew very long and pointed. He stuggled to get up, but there was a sickening crunching sound as his leg bones changed shape. Utena's stomach turned at the sound. Saionji fell, revealing a steadily growing bump on the seat of his pants, he could no longer stand erect on two legs. Utena saw terror in his eyes, she began to feel afraid as well. Every instinct told her to run, but she had to stay! She promised! Even nif it was Saionji, she couldn't leave him here alone!  
She noticed Saionji's body swelling, becoming large and very muscular, his shirt ripping in several places revealing the fur and definition beneath. He pushed himself up onto his knees with his claw-like hands. He looked at Utena in desparation. She noticed his teeth were becoming enormous fangs and were hanging out of his mouth, accompanied by a disgusting stretching sound and more macabre cracking from different parts of his body. He tried to speak, his voice sounded distorted with chilling tones, but there was still some tones that were distinctly Saionji.  
"U-Ten-A, Please don't go. I don't want to be alone. Just donn-awwwwrrooo," His voice box shifted and changed so suddenly that he couldn't even finish his sentence. He gripped his throat with his talon -like hands in disbelief. His face became very canine and his nose merged with his mouth to form a muzzle to accomodate his fangs in one swift motion. His shoes suddenly burst open, revealing the five taloned feet that were being crushed inside them the whole time. It was followed by another ripping sound from the seat of his pants, where a large bushy tail exploded outward. The change finally complete, Utena stood trembling before an enormous monster which had moments before been her classmate. She swallowed hard and continued to tremble, despite efforts to stop. The monster let out a hrrible, mournful howl, the sound revealed its dual nature, the cry of a wild animal mixed with the screams of a human being trapped and afraid. 


	3. Enigmatic Exploratory Explanation

Thanks so much for Reviews, I really don't know where this story will lead, so bear with me as I figure it out, okay?  
Thanks!  
Chibi Hime  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: Utena and Saionji, not mine, wolfie Saionji-All Mine and mine alone! Bothersome insects!  
sorry, got a little carried away there.  
  
  
  
Blood On The Roses Chapter Three  
  
Utena looked at the still, wolflike form of her classmate. Moment after his transformation completed, he had collapsed inexplicably. Utena was finally able to absorb all that had happened in the last few minutes. What's happening to Saionji and Why? How?  
She decided to attempt to revive her unconscious classmate, it would be frightfully frigid of her to leave him there. alone, dare she ay afraid and well....furry. She knelt beside him and gave im a light shake. When this failed to provoke any action, she shook him more violently, this time speaking his name loudly.  
"Saionji?"  
"Saionji? Are you alright?"  
A voice? Talking to him? It sounded familiar, but his thoughts were so blurry, he had trouble putting anything together. All he could remember was going to he Rose Garden for something, he couldn't remember what. Utena Tenjou was there at first she smiled, but then she looked horrified. Then everything went black. Now he was trying to open his eyes and attempt to undersand what had happened. He must've blacked out, could happen to anyone in that damn garden, it was so hot. As his eyes came into focus, he could see two large blue eyes and a face framed by pink hair. Utena! Her concerned expression clawed at the core of his being for a moment.  
He wanted to tell her everything, he had to tell someone, anyone about the dream he just had. Far from being a "bad dream", it had been a nightmare, the kind of dream that drives people insane, but now that he was awake, he felt much more confident, imaginary phantasms couldn't hurt him now.  
Utena looked into his eyes and gave a start.  
What's wrong with her? he wondered. He tried to say her name, but to his horror, the only sound that came out was a snarl.  
This startled Utena so greatly that she fell over backward and scrambled in a crablike manner until she was about ten feet away from him. She was breathing quickly, adrenaline surging through her like a flooded riverbed. She could feel her heart beating in her chest so strongly, she feared it would burst. She began to take deep breaths to calm herself, which seemed to help, if only a little.  
Saionji's mind and heart were racing. He tried to stand up, but found he couldn't. His legs weren't built to stand upright. He fell on his hands and observed how cruel and deadly they were. He looked in disgust at his clawlike hands, which were no longer really hands. He tried to voice his confusion, but no words would come, only animal growls. It was all real, it wasn't a dream, he couldn't wake up.  
Oh God! What's happening?! How? Why? What am I going to do? What am I? Am I even human anymore? Was I ever? What am I? He thought to himself thousands of time in seconds. Finally, mentally exhausted, he lay himself on the ground to collect himself. After a few moments, he decided to check on Utena, if she was even still there. If anything like this ever happened while he was around, he would have run away long before this point. He stood up and scanned the garden. She was still there, he felt amazed. There she sat in the same position she had when she first scrambled away, she was breathing slower now, but she never took her eyes off him. He slowly approched her. She backed away a little more, trying to look brave, but her fear showed in her eyes. Her eyes......those deep pools of blue, reflecting the moonlight, reflecting.....him. He tried to focus on the image on her iris. What he saw terrified him more than anything ever had before. He was looking at himself, but it wasn't himself, it was a giant, wolflike animal with cruel claws and savage teeth. He was afraid of himself. He shuddered to think of the horrible rumors and torment lay in store for him if an of this ever got out.  
I scare myself! No wonder Utena is so afraid. What are these claws made for? I don't want to know! he thought.  
He whimpered and sat dowt to himself.n in front of Utena. Utena looked deep int his eyes. She was taken by hw human they were. They glittered with the intelligence, pain and shame of he classmate.  
'Saionji?"  
He pricked his ears up and gave a more cheerful whimper.  
"You alright? You're you, right?"  
He nodded.   
"Okay. Sorry, but you scared me for a second. Does it still hurt?"  
He shook his head.  
"Well, that's a start. I guess,"  
Saionji was just glad to have company. Even if it was Utena, she impressed him. Her courage was omniprescent, not only on the dueling field. His exhaustion finally caught up with him and he fell asleep, able to sleep his first peaceful sleep in a week. Utena sighed, she couldn't leave him here. She made a quick trip to her dorm room and back for some old blankets and pillows. Then she returned to the Rose Garden. She set up a small makeshift bed for herself and then took an extra blanket over to Saionji. His uniform was ripped and tattered. She undid the buttons so he could sleep without discomfort, then covered him with the extra blanket. She returned to her corner of the room and fell asleep.  
Saionji awoke a few hours later, Utena was snoring rather unceremoniously and laying with her feet and arms sprawled across her pile of blankets. He noticed that he was covered with a blanket and that th buttons of his uniform had been undone. Had Utena done this? She had to have! She was the only one there, how could she be so nice? So kindhearted, especially to someone who had been so cruel to her in the past, how could she do it? Saionji was puzzled beyond anyhting he ever had been. This night was definitely the worst night of his life. Until now, he'd been a playboy of sorts, not anywhere near Touga Kiryu, mind you, but still above the normal Academy fodder. Now, now what was he? Who honestly knew, he didn't that was certain. He was no longer Kyoichi Saionji, Vice President of the Student Council, Captain of the kendo team, no, now he was Kyuoichi Saionji, Freak of Nature and Inhuman Thing. Funny how your social status can change in such a short amount of time.  
He got up and walked around the Rose Garden, experimenting with his oddly shaped legs. Saionji found that it was in actuality, quite simple to walk on four legs. In a bizarre way, it seemed natural, like he should have been walking in that fashion all the time. He quickly banished the thought from his mind, fearing it would somehow prevent him from returning to his human self, if in truth, that was even possible. Saionji was ashamed to admit it, bt he was afraid. Deeply afraid, even after several hours of dealing with his "change", he refused to call it anything else, he was still horribly shaken. Not being able to voice his frustrations only added to his misery. It compounded his agitation, causing him to suddenly desire to sink his teeth into something, anything and rip it to shreds. He shuddered at the sudden violent thought, but the more he thought about it, he had always been a violent person. He had been violent in his passions, his convictions, even his love was laced with harsh words and physical aggression.   
Kami-sama! Had it always been that obvious! The clues at what I really am were always in front of my eyes and I was too blind to see them! He thought to himself.  
"Good doggie," a feminine voice announced rather audibly.  
Saionji jerked his head around to face whoever had spoken to him. At once infuriated and surprised beyond all sense, he growled at the intruder who stood behind him. His greyish blue eyes widened at a sight that he was not fully prepared to comprehend or accept. Before him stood a girl, younger than himself and Utena. She had light violet hair and she wore a strange smile, which illuminated her features in a rather forboding manner. She held a gawdy wand with a star topper and several ribbons dangled from it. She let out a rather girlish giggle that made the fur along Saionji's spine stand on end. The strange girl opened her eyes to reveal rich orbs of lime beneath her ivory lids.  
"You really are a good doggie, aren't you Kyoichi?"  
How could this girl know his name? How did she know who he was? He had only told......Utena! That traitor! She must have her , He should have known better than to trust someone......   
"Ms. Tenjou has nothing to do with this, so don't even think of pulling her into this,"  
He could only stare at her, completely dumbfounded. Saionji felt his jaw drop open, he immediately pulled it shut.   
"I suppose you're a tad confused at the moment, aren't you? No need to answer, I'm well aware that it is well beyond your capacity. I'll answer any questions you might, oh! I'm sorry, silly me! I'd forgotten. you can't ask questions. I think I like you best this way, silent!"  
Saionji growled deeply at her. This demonic child unnerved him. She obviously was well aware of everything that had transpired and what it all meant, while he himself was unaware f what was happening to his own body. He bared his fangs at her and had the sudden desire to rip her throat out. He was startled at the sheer violence of the thought. He blinked several times to clear the image of her bloodied body from his mind.  
"Tch. That's not nice, Kyoichi," she said softly, shaking her head.  
"Well, I know you're new to this, so I'll forgive you this tim. You're probably wondering what is going on, right?"  
He could only nod, feeling horribly embarassed at his inability to vocalize intelligible sounds, having to resort to this form of primitive communication was demeaning.  
"Alright, I'll tell you. It'd be cruel not to. Before we start, my name is Leila. Ms. Tenjou won't hear a word of this, I've made sure that her ears are plugged,"  
The girl tapped her wand a few times in the air. When she seemed satisfied with her work, she turned back to him and continued.  
"I'll start at the very begining. long ago, there lived two wealthy families. The first family had a son who was quite handsome and extremely kind and loving, but none of the town's girls would even look at him, for they knew of rumors about the family, that no one spoke of, but everyone knew. He was very sad and alone, until one day a new family moved into town. This family was wealthy as well. They had a daughter the same age as their son. The two met at school and were immediate friends. The wealthy young man had never had any kindness shown to him from anyone but his family and became infatuated with the daughter. Years passed, the two graduated from college, got lucrative jobs and became wealthy themselves. Their friendship had blossomed into love and one night, under a new moon, the oldest son proposed to the daughter. she accepted and the two were wed shortly after. However, on their wedding night, a full moon, the eldest son of one friendly revealed to the eldest daughter, now his wife, that he was not human. No, he was less than human, he was a werewolf. The rumors were true, the family was cursed. He had not told her before for fear of rejection, he had not meant any harm.   
The daughter did not run, or scream at him, or his monstous appearance. Rather, she said that she loved him and would never leave him. Can you imagine his joy in that instant? It was that very night that you came into being, Kyoichi. A few months later, you were born. All rejoiced that you were a normal, human baby. Perhaps the curse that had lasted for generations had been broken by true love. You see, all the previous marriages on your father's side had been arranged, love came later, after they were bound for life.  
But happiness was short lived. On the first full moon after your birth, you changed. Your parents were heartbroken. They had thought that you would be spared from the humiliation and torment that the townspeople showed to your father's side of the family. They searched far and wide for a sorceress who could put a binding spell on such a condition, to prevent it from happening all the time, if at all. Who they found was my grandmother, she did place a binding spell on it, the binding spell was temporary, but effective.   
It was too late for you to stay in their town, though. one of the gossipy servants had seen you in your inhuman state and had immediately gone to the church and told everyone at the Bake Sale that was going on there. momentarily, everyone knew. So you were sent to live with your aunt, who knew of none of this. That is why se never told you what you really are. To be brutally honest, I don't think its all that bad. One night a month, you're a savage looking animal, it's not like its every night or something.   
Well, the sun is rising, so I'd best be on my way. You'll be back to yourself in no time. I'll return on the next full moon in the afternoon to see if you have any questions, farwell, Kyoichi. I really do like you best this way,"  
She leaned closer to him and stroked the fur along his back. Her stroking sent a sensual shiver down his spine. Saionji was uddenly frightened, did he actually enjoy that feeling? Was he accepting the animal hat he was?  
With a wave of her daft wand, Leila was gone. Saionji barely had time to think over anything she had said before the first rays of sunlight caressed his form. immediately, the pain was raging over him, only in reverse. It felt as though he were being crushed, parts of him were pushing into his bones. his claws shrank and became hands again, the claws forcing their way bak into his fingers, renewing the flow of blood. His back legs cracked as the bones changed direction and his talons shrank back to relatively small human feet. His nose and mouth separated and his enormous fangs resumed their perfect shapes in his flawless mouth. His fur retreated back through his pores, which was not as painful as it was when it forced itself outwards. He sat there, on his hands and knees, panting heavily. He remained in that position for at least an hour. Saionji could hear birds singing and the sun beat on his back.  
"Saionji?"  
He turned suddenly towards the voice, his wild green hair falling over one of his eyes.  
"Utena! I...I" he stammered.  
Saionji struggled to his feet, falling several times. utena finally extended a hand and helped him. For a moment their eyes met. Saionji swallowed hard. Utena looked him over. How sad and dissheveled he looked. Perspiring, shaking and clothed in the tattered remains of his once proud Student Council uniform. She felt a great pity arise in her heart. Saionji selfconsciously brushed his green hair out of his face. Utena's round eyes softened.  
"Hey, after you get cleaned up, you wanna have breakfast in the cafeteria? I'm never awake for it normally. We could talk some more about solving your problem,"  
Saionji smiled. He was quite relieved that it was not a date, just a friendly gesture.   
"Sure," he managed to say, his throat still sore from his voice box shifting.   
With Utena's support, Saionji managed to hobble to his dorm room and change into a pair of jeans and a black sleeveless top. After some freshening up, he returned to the rose Garden to find Utena waiting for him, already changed into a new outfit herself. Without another word, the two headed towards the cafeteria as the sun warmed the worls after its seemingly peaceful slumber.  
  
End Chapter 3  
Like it? Totally despise it?  
I'm thinking of doing a little saionji X wakaba later. I don't know, that may change. Thanks for reading! Thanks for the reviews!  
Special thanks to Zeeta (First reviewer!) and Larania (Second Reviewer!) 


	4. What is this Trust?

OMG! An Update? Yeah! I had previously tried to do this chapter, but the first attempt was damn awful! It was actually embarrassing *_*;;;; It took a few months, a few papers and a screenplay later, and finally the update is here! ^_^ Still waiting for "I'll Take Care Of You" Inspiration ^_^;;;; But I did start the next chapter1  
  
Those of you who like soundtracks with your fics, the image song for this fic is "Always Know Where You Are" from Treasure Planet. Yes, sappy song but I thought it fit.  
  
As always! I don't own Utena! or Saionji or Wakaba  
  
Chapter 4: What is this Trust?  
  
"Fool,"  
  
"...The joke of the Student Council,"  
  
"Good for nothing..."  
  
"...animal...,"  
  
"freak,"  
  
....................................."monster,"...  
  
A pair of purplish grey eyes shot open. Saionji was breathing hard and a cold sweat had broken out across his pale skin. He sat up slowly and looked about the darkened room. The stars shone outside the window and moonlight fell gracefully through the pane of glass behind him. He cast an uncertain look up at the person asleep on the bed next to him. Curled up into a ball under the covers was a quietly snoring Wakaba Shinohara.   
  
How long was it since he had come to stay with her? Two weeks? Three? Yes, three. For three weeks, he had been sleeping on the floor of her dorm room. It seemed so normal to call this little room home now, which was ridiculous of course, but somehow...it just felt normal. It was odd, being taken in by one he had injured so horribly in the past. Given the chance, he would have gone back and stopped himself from embarassing her for such a heartfelt declaration of love. It still brought a twang of guilt to his already wracked brain when he thought about it. How could he have been so cold, so cruel to the only one who honestly cared about him? Because he didn't know. He didn't know anything. That Saionji back there...the one who had been so animalistic and unthinking...the sadistic duelist...the girl beater..he was dead. He had died three weeks ago, but he had been dying since before the first time Saionji changed. A slow, painful death, leaving only this new, inexperienced Saionji in his place.  
  
Saionji gave a shudder and drew his knees up to his chest. He hugged them tightly and rocked slowly back and forth. Looking back on it, it was all a horrible mistake. His whole life had been, one careless mistake after another until his behavior had become so inexcusable...it didn't matter now. He had been expelled. He needn't think about that anymore. That day he thought the castle was coming down...he had been a little relieved when he thought he was going to die. In some twisted part of his mind, he was glad he was being crushed...then..his curse would die with him. No one besides that "prince" would know...he wouldn't pass it on to his children and no one would ever know.   
  
Then, he realized it was an illusion...that he was still alive. Infuriated by this alone, the final straw had been HER! That so called prince, latching onto the emotionless puppet that was the Rose Bride while he, the one she promised to help, lay on the ground like a fool. it had been too much. He'd lost control and hadn't been the same since. He remembered when he first stepped outside the gates of the Academy. He'd felt as though a huge weight had been lifted, but at the same time, an overwhelming despair had taken hold of him. Everything he'd ever been had been either a deception or the result of the lack of personal discipline he had thought kendo would teach him. That was when he realized that he ws a disgusting human being...no...he wasn't a human being, was he? No...he was a freak...a monster...and no one cared about the monster...in all the stories, the people rejoiced when such a creature was "put out of its misery". He remembered how he had sunk to his knees, depressed beyond all definition of the word. Then, a hand had been placed on his shoulder. It sent a tingling sensation through his shoulder, as he was unaccustomed to being touched in such a reassuring way. When he looked to see who it was comforting him, his amazement had been apparent because the now familiar face of Wakaba Shinohara had softened and been encouraging. She had offered him a place to stay. That was more than his so called best friend had ever done.  
  
How could she care for someone so openly cruel to others? She had felt his venomous sting more than anyone, so why did she help him? Is this what it is to love someone?  
  
To help them, no matter what?  
  
How could anyone love him? When he didn't love another living thing, not even himself anymore?  
  
Because she doesn't know.  
  
That thought jolted him back to the present.  
  
He still hadn't told her.  
  
And he was running out of time.   
  
The wall calendar that hung beside Wakaba's bed served as a constant reminder. He had to either tell her tomorrow or wait another month. She deserved to know, he knew that. But, it just might worry her. She might never look at him the same way again. She might hate him.  
  
Why would that matter? Everyone else already does. It would just be another name on the list.   
  
But it did bother him.  
  
He wondered if it was really worth telling her. After all, he could sneak out while she was at an afterschool club. He could leave a message that would say he'd be back the next morning. He could make up an excuse when he thought about it. That seemed like a more simplistic plan and one that was equally effective. He continued the internal debate with himself until Wakaba's alarm sounded.   
She rose from her bed as if she were an automotan and went about her morning routine. After a few moments, she stuck her head out of her iny bathroom and said a bubbly "Good Morning" through a mouthful of toothpaste. He had to smile at her. She meant well, but her overzealousness often made Wakaba look immature and childish.  
  
But after spending time with her, Saionji had realized she was childlike, not childish. There was a world of difference.  
When Wakaba emerged from the bathroom, she was fully dressed for school and was occupied with pulling her hair into a short ponytail.  
  
Saionji started:  
  
"Hey, Wakaba?"  
  
He would tell her everything, no secrets, he'd just tell her everything, it would feel good to get it all out, he'd....... He'd looked into those enormous, innocent brown eyes and whatever he had been about to say died.  
  
Wakaba blinked twince before asking:  
  
"Saionji-sempai? Is something wrong?"  
  
Saionji swallowed hard. He couldn't do it. he needed something to hold onto and he wasn't about to lose it for the sake of being truthful. Frankly, at such a low point in his life, he needed those innocent brown eyes. They somehow reassured him that everything would be alright, even though their owner did not know of his predicament.   
  
"Na-no-nothing. You just look cute today, that's all,"  
  
He looked off into the corner, a little ashamed of the excuse he made.  
  
Wakaba stared at him dumbly for a moment.  
  
Then her cheeks began to slowly glow bright pink.  
  
There was a knock at the door.  
  
Saionji thanked whatever diety was listening for the interruption and took his customary dive under the bed.  
  
He heard Wakaba make small talk with whoever was at the door. After a few minutes, she left for school with whoever had knocked.  
  
After he was sure they were gone, Saionji punched the floor is frustration. This action was immediately followed by a stifled scream as his nerve endings jolted awake. 


End file.
